Stephanie Taglianetti - One Year Wiser

One Year Wiser

 

Stephanie Taglianetti

 

The scene opens in Sarah’s bedroom.  Sarah and Jenny are roommates, and Jenny bursts into Sarah’s room and slams the door shut behind her.

 

Jenny:  It’s over.

 

Sarah:  What’s over?

 

Jenny:  Adam and Me.

 

Sarah(Almost hysterically.)  Wait!  What?  Why do you look so calm?  Why are you not freaking out?  It’s freaking me out that you’re not freaking out about this …

 

Jenny:  All right, first of all, you need to stop freaking out.  And second, I knew it was coming.  I have had a feeling for a while now.

 

Sarah(Offended.) What the hell, Jenny!  Why didn’t you say anything to me?  I’m pretty sure we are best friends and I’m pretty sure that you tell your best friend when you have a “feeling” that your relationship is about to end …

 

Jenny:  Well, look how you’re reacting right now!  Oh my god!  It’s like you’re the one who broke up with your boyfriend.  And you fucking suck at lying to people’s faces, Sar.  When I told you that I bought Adam a ticket to visit me while I was staying in California for the summer, you got all twitchy and nervous and weird around him until you finally blurted it out …

 

Sarah:  Seriously?  You’re bringing that up again.  UCK enough, I don’t want to fight about this.  It’s totally irrelevant.

 

 

Jenny:  Okay, I was just saying why I didn’t tell you …

 

Sarah:  Okay, okay.  But, what happened?  You guys seemed perfectly fine when I saw you guys the other night.  You seemed normal.

 

Jenny:  That was the problem.  We kind of reached a plateau in our relationship …

 

Sarah(Flatly; sarcastic/condescending.)  A plateau?  A fucking plateau?  What the hell, Jen.  We are 22, and you were dating him for a year.  How is that even possible?

 

Jenny:  Jesus, Sarah.  Can you try and be a little less aggressive about this whole thing?  Just because I don’t look upset doesn’t mean I’m not upset about it.

 

Sarah:  I’m sorry.  You know how I get.  I am easily excitable.

 

Jenny:  I know …

 

Sarah:  All right, tell me about the plateau shit …

 

Jenny(Defensively.)  Okay, I know we were only dating for a year, but we were really close friends for three years before we even started dating and the year before we did start dating officially we were practically in a relationship anyways.

 

Sarah:  Yeah, that’s true.  Everyone knew you guys were like, completely in love with each other.

 

(She notices that Jenny gets upset)

 

Sorry.

 

Jenny:

It’s fine.  (Beat.)  Sarah, I feel like Adam and I were just meant to be friends.  Like, the entire year of our relationship just wasn’t the same as when we were friends.  We were so distant and disconnected this past year when we became official.  It’s like we both knew from the beginning it wasn’t working, but we loved each other so much as friends that we just didn’t have the heart to say it to each other …

 

Sarah:  But, that’s okay, right?  It’s good that you guys noticed it now before you started getting more serious about it?

 

Jenny:  Well, yeah.  But that is still one year of my life that I am never going to get back.

 

Sarah:  I mean, I guess try and treat it as a learning experience.

 

Jenny:  I learned to never date your best friend.

 

Sarah:  Don’t say that.  Besides, it’s like practically an unwritten rule that you’re supposed to marry your best friend anyways.  Maybe Adam just wasn’t your best friend.  Just, like, a really, really, good friend or something.

 

Jenny:  I guess …

 

Sarah:  Just stay positive, Jenny. 

 

Jenny:  I mean, you’re right in a way.  I did learn a lot.  I guess the least I could say about of this whole mess is that I am one year wiser …

 

Sarah:  UCK you always say the most cliché shit …